I think it's pretty easy for us to know when we're discouraged about a relationship with someone else. We know what we wish they'd do differently, we have evidence for what they've done (or haven't done), we blame them, or feel discouraged about the future of the relationship.
If you're feeling discouraged but it's not about a relationship with someone else then it's likely about your relationship with yourself. We have a much harder time seeing this type.
Most people don't even realize that they have a relationship with themselves, but we all do.
Your relationship with yourself is made of the thoughts you think about yourself. What are those thoughts? They matter because they dictate how you feel about yourself. They also matter because they directly lead to how you act in your life.
Go back to the first paragraph of this post and see how that second sentence can be totally applied to your relationship with yourself:
We know what we wish we would do differently
We have evidence for what we've done (or haven't done)
We blame ourself
We feel discouraged about our future
What is happening with your relationship with yourself?
In what ways are you feeling discouraged about yourself?